Hospital

Yesterday I went to the hospital here in London. That's me with my bracelet reaching for the light.

I don't like hospitals. But my condition and symptoms were too scary. Catherine, who has been caring for me, insisted I go-- she is a professional healer herself. Like a little boy, she held my hand while they did all sorts of tests on me-- blood stuff really really bothers me and I can't quite handle it. I hope Catherine can still move her hand and fingers.

Two doctors saw me. I was so impressed. They took their time and each took my condition really seriously. Each asked patiently many questions and looked me over super carefully. Their attention to detail was actually relieving.

Afterwards, they said it was good I came in, but wasnt necessary to stay. They concluded I hadn't had a stroke or even mini strokes.

I still feel really not so good. My symptoms are dimishing though. I am back with Catherine and Gudrun now. They are both healers who I met in Paris around my presentation and through the most blessed syncronicity and generosity hwere there when I crashed and open their arms to take me in.

Their holistic, homeopathic and oriental healing bacground sees much deeper into my condition than it seems a Western perspective could. The doctors were able to test and diagnose me there at that moment in great detail, but only derive a rather superficial diagnosis. Catherine and Gudrun are seeing through to the deeper root causes. Their diagnosis and healing includes remedies and wisdom on the dietary, energetic, sexual and emotional facets of Russell.

Its profound. The western way would have given me pills and pharmeceuticals. Now, with their help and guidance I am seeing myself a new. I am poised to transform old ways of my life into a much deeper and integrated understanding of myself and way to live.

You dont get this from a normal doctor.

They are continuing to treat me here at their clinics in London.

I rest. I heal.

A Wounded Escape from the Dark Valley

I have been resting the last few days to stabilize my dangerously depleted energy. It's a good opportunity to reflect on my moment.

I have made it to Paris. Two days ago I presented the 1Mandala to 1000 people at the Marriot conference in the heart of the city. My beautifully wonderful lover Abby came to join and be with me for the week. What a turbulent week it has been! I am very grateful for her love and support while she was here.

It was the pinacle of an epic month of exertion to let go of my laptop, to get all my digital life and work online and on my iPhone, and to get here to Paris. Not only that, but I cycled from Florence to Assisi-- climbing mountains, camping in vineyards and cliff laid olive orchards.

But the combination of working really really hard on my laptop, living in a sedate and smoky apartment then jumping back on my bike really took it's toll.

Deep breath

I think I've had a mini stroke. :-(

Serious I know

Cycling alone through Tuscany it was a rather frightening experience. An almost imperceptible yet undeniable tingling persisted on one side of my body. My left hand seemed almost seemed to tremble, my face slightly numb.

On my bike through Tuscany I wondered what was going on in me!? It was really slight-- maybe it was my imagination? What in the world could I possibly do? How would I find the right person to talk to about what happened? How would I find a space for healing?

The folks here with HT France and of course Abby have been tremendously helpful. I rest a few extra days at the apartment where we stayed for the presentation.

Its so ironic. I had to work so hard in the old way-- crouched and bleary eyed in front of my laptop for hours-- to escape to the new way-- everything online, purely collaborative, and fancy free on my iPhone. Where I have arrived is exponentially a more healthy and integrated way of living. Yet, the intense amount of energy to move up a level, and alas the back-step into the old world literally short circuited me. Not eating well, seldom doing yoga, and an inordinate dose of unhealthy energy from those around me really hit me hard. I've plummetted from 105% health to 65% health in a month. Shitty. Scary.

It's as if the Pilgrim on life's way, weary after labouring hard to climb out of a dark valley, and on to a new, higher, sun-bathed plateau, lunges the last few steps to the top-- and a rusty barbed wire, lurking in the shadows cuts and wounds him deeply. He makes to the top, yet he staggers. He bleeds.

The wound is deep and the sun so bright.

Resting in London

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London light gently spills through my window. I rest.

Fun in France

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A few days ago I presented the 1Mandala project to about 1000 people here in Paris. I've been also having a wonderful time with my lover Abby. Her prescence has been a source of joy, fun and much needed support.

Here's a snippet of the fun part:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uKT2P9he1-c&feature=youtube_gdata

Russell, Abby & Amour in Paris

I have made it to Paris. My beautiful lover has joined me. I am in the midst of new friends and the building momentum for Neil D Walsche's talk and my presentation. Inadvertently It is also proving a moment for healing. The road of the heart also has it's hills. They can take their toll. Yet the company of like minded souls and those you love is a profound consolation.

Posted via email from 1mandala's posterous

Learning to use my iPhone to take videos as I arrive in Assisi, Italy

Rome!

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I stand in the centre of Rome! THIS is a long way from Smithers in the isolated Northwest of Canada. I have come a long way.

Paris is next! Big 1mandala presentation on the 6th in Paris.