Wow. I have had so many profound comments on my last blog about Fears.
I've been challenged to write about Triadic Relationships. Indeed, I've been intending to do so for months yet I have feared to. Thinking about it something struck me: Dreams and Fears are pretty much the same thing.
I had the dream of doing art in Berlin. It took me so long to get here, not just because I biked, but because I feared it: working in the a city, not knowing the language, not having a job or any friends. It was a dream to live, and it was a great fear to confront.
I am observing this in so many people I meet. They dream of following their heart, quitting their job and doing what they really love. Yet, this is precisely what they fear the most.
I have a dream of experiencing a Triadic Relationship. I have had this idea for quite a while now, but I have feared expressing it. The idea is simple: a relationship with myself and two others, all love each other, and each knows of the other's love.
The idea resonates with me so much: I love relationships. I love the intricate dynamics of getting to know people. I love women. I love commitment and honesty and openeness. I love sex. I love experiencing new things. I love challenges. A triad multiplies all these things and triangles are the strongest and most flexible of shapes. Life is short. What do I have to loose? Why not?
Wow... it would be such a profound and fun experience!
I have feared telling people about this dream because I feared being seen as weird or having some sort of sexual perversion. I have feared being different.
Yet, perhaps I think I too highly of myself in feeling "different".
Talking to friend for the first time about Triadic Relationships, she pointed out how commonplace triadic or plural relationships actually are. Men and women have extramarital affiars all the time with a third person. People cheat on their girl/boyfriends all the time. Such relationships are all over the place!
Its just that people don't talk about it. The concept is shunned and disparaged. People feel guilty about the idea and the experience. Like me!
However, my vision however is of embracing this triadic dynamic-- I envision such a triadic relationship in glorious open splendour.
I imagine dazzling openeness, transparency, and all encompassing love! I've been working on a painting to capture this intention of a Triadic relationship. Three people hold hands in an open green field under the blue sky. They smile as together they complete a circle. The sun shines down upon them. Openess and love cast aside any shadows. It would be a such a relational, cultural, existential, and societal adventure! It would be crazy cool.
Having all those involved being conscious and intentional about the relationship and the adventure is crucial. Like any relationship, fears and insecurities will be there to confront. More than ever, it will be crucial that each has consciousnessly chosen the experience and adventure.
And here we return to the connection between dreams and fears. How can you experience your dream if your fears push it away? How can your dream ever come true if you can't even talk about it? Or post a blog about it for that matter.
With a deep breath I click on Post for this blog!
_____
Here's the link to the final, finished painting!
I've been challenged to write about Triadic Relationships. Indeed, I've been intending to do so for months yet I have feared to. Thinking about it something struck me: Dreams and Fears are pretty much the same thing.
I had the dream of doing art in Berlin. It took me so long to get here, not just because I biked, but because I feared it: working in the a city, not knowing the language, not having a job or any friends. It was a dream to live, and it was a great fear to confront.
I am observing this in so many people I meet. They dream of following their heart, quitting their job and doing what they really love. Yet, this is precisely what they fear the most.
I have a dream of experiencing a Triadic Relationship. I have had this idea for quite a while now, but I have feared expressing it. The idea is simple: a relationship with myself and two others, all love each other, and each knows of the other's love.
The idea resonates with me so much: I love relationships. I love the intricate dynamics of getting to know people. I love women. I love commitment and honesty and openeness. I love sex. I love experiencing new things. I love challenges. A triad multiplies all these things and triangles are the strongest and most flexible of shapes. Life is short. What do I have to loose? Why not?
Wow... it would be such a profound and fun experience!
I have feared telling people about this dream because I feared being seen as weird or having some sort of sexual perversion. I have feared being different.
Yet, perhaps I think I too highly of myself in feeling "different".
Talking to friend for the first time about Triadic Relationships, she pointed out how commonplace triadic or plural relationships actually are. Men and women have extramarital affiars all the time with a third person. People cheat on their girl/boyfriends all the time. Such relationships are all over the place!
Its just that people don't talk about it. The concept is shunned and disparaged. People feel guilty about the idea and the experience. Like me!
However, my vision however is of embracing this triadic dynamic-- I envision such a triadic relationship in glorious open splendour.
I imagine dazzling openeness, transparency, and all encompassing love! I've been working on a painting to capture this intention of a Triadic relationship. Three people hold hands in an open green field under the blue sky. They smile as together they complete a circle. The sun shines down upon them. Openess and love cast aside any shadows. It would be a such a relational, cultural, existential, and societal adventure! It would be crazy cool.
Having all those involved being conscious and intentional about the relationship and the adventure is crucial. Like any relationship, fears and insecurities will be there to confront. More than ever, it will be crucial that each has consciousnessly chosen the experience and adventure.
And here we return to the connection between dreams and fears. How can you experience your dream if your fears push it away? How can your dream ever come true if you can't even talk about it? Or post a blog about it for that matter.
With a deep breath I click on Post for this blog!
_____
Here's the link to the final, finished painting!
No comments:
Post a Comment