Thursday, November 20, 2008

Thank God for the Pain

This could be a long entry.  I've got alot of time, alot of ideas, and.... alot of pain.

Its been three years now that I've had some dental issues that really needed to be addressed. Every visit to the dentist I'd be reminded that it needed to be done.  Alas, working as an independent artist in Canada, there's virtually no support of any kind.   I know, because I've repeated entreated my Smithers dentist to do an exchange of art for services, I've written emergency artists grants, and I've been compelled to sell paintings specifically to pay for dental work.  

As you can tell by my blog and art site, I am full out serious artist-- yet despite that, and over a dozen grant attempts to Canadian organizations for authentic help (just in 2007!)  nothing came of it.   I was reviewing my accounting for 2007 just the otherday and was shocked at just how little money did come through.

Last, night, as I sat in the dentist's chair, what in Canada would have been thousands of dollars and months of appointments, were done in three hours.     Three very long hours that is!  I arrived at 7:45 and he worked til 11:30PM.

Yes, that's right:  Just 'he'.  There were no assistants, secretaries, no fancy reception area, no couches or other extravagancies.   The Belgian dentist, who had all the latest equipement, techniques and skills, did it all himself.   The monks had set up the appointment three days prior.   Two wisdom teeth and several years of issues were all dealt with in one decisive, fell swoop.  

Now, that's what I can a Dentist.  I have nothing but respect and gratitude for his work and his marathon dedication last night.  He just did it.

As I sat there, even during the exquisitely uncomfortable extration of a reluctant wisdom tooth, I was thanking and praising the universe!   Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.   I simply couldn't fathom all this was manisfesting so suddenly.   Every issue was addressed.  My teeth are perfect.

Ha ha!  Thank God for the Pain!

OK... this would normally be where I end the post, but I am going to push on.  This might get a tad personal

I am a firm believer that physical ailments are largely the consequence of our outlook on ourselves and life--  it is over time and through habit finally manifest in our body.  So what do my dental issues say about my mindset?   I know that I have been long reluctant to reflect and talk about this.   That in itself says something.

It is said that people often eat sweet things to compensate for feelings of aloneness.   I hardly feel alone now, perhaps that is why I've been able to manifest this healing.  I know that I certainly have felt alone and have tended towards sweet food.    This pattern has cycled through my life and has had an effect on my teeth.  I know my Mum has had similar issues with her soft teeth.

One of my major set of problems was also caused by brushing too hard.   That is quite interesting.  Brushing was my way of trying to deal with what I knew were increasing dental problems-- but not really deal with it.  It was my superficial bandaid.  Ironically, by brushing hard I did more damage than good.   This was what the dentist emphasized.

Interesting.  Well, in my pain killer stupour today, I will have lots to ponder.

Here's a quote to close on:

" "no man is hurt but by himself."


Diogenes said that, and he was right. Every person's

experience is created internally, by him or herself. No

one outside of you can tell you what anything means,

or whether you are "hurt" or not.

If you feel hurt by something or someone, it is the result

of your decision to feel that way. This may be tough to

hear, but it is true. You can change your mind at any

moment.about how something is affecting you."

-- Neil Donald Walsh

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